Decisions...Decisions

The nice thing about my walk/runs (or just walks in general) compared to my run/walks is that the slower pace and less running gives me time to reflect with in my self. Which is ALWAYS nice. :)

Today's I've realized a few things and also made some decisions about a few other things.

1. My frustration these last few weeks has been due to the "lack" of weight loss... or better put... my ever increasing bloating that has been occurring... the why of it and the way it effects the scale. And along with that means that I've been frustrated that all my hard work in a safe and healthy way is not letting me lose as much as I did that 1st month. I have been banking on losing 2lbs a week. And not reaching that goal week after week this month is really what has me feeling inadequate. And yes, I KNOW any amount of weight loss, no matter how big or small is a good thing. Is a step in the right direction... Still, it's been a deep rooted issue I've not been acknowledging. SO!! TODAY I've come to the realization that I'm being a dumb ass. Sorry, there is no other word for it. I needed to be slapped and in a way... one of my readers did so by a comment she'd left this week. Funny thing is... it was a Kudos comment. Wasn't even a proverbial slap. But it was a sort of a wake up call for me. That mental slap we give ourselves when we have that light bulb go off. That HEY! Stop that attitude. So what you're not losing 2lbs every week... YOU'RE LOSING!! YOU CAN CALL YOURSELF A LOSER JULES!! And that is the whole point of any of it. It's not the amount of weight each week... it's the loss.

2. I've realized that I am really impressed and inspired by Hollie and all that she is doing for herself to take control of her life and the food in it. I never thought I would be some one who could give up sugar. I'm still not sure I can. I'm not sure I could give up caffeine. BUT I do know that I CAN limit myself. I already do. I used to drink a tad bit of coffee with my creamer and a tad bit of coffee with my sugar. Over this last 6 months since my dad died I have cut those to... just a tad of each in my coffee. BIG switch! I no longer get yummy fattening coffee drinks when i buy them at places like Starbucks... i buy just a plain ol' non fat latte. Pretty amazing coming from me. Since starting in this new lifestyle change I've cut red meat out of my diet. I have not had it ONCE since Feb 1st. And I'm a steak and taters girl. Who cut out taters and sides alike over a year ago. Taters are only a must if the dish calls for it to be a must. And red meat is now a thing of my past... although I crave it every day... I just KNOW my cholesterol can't take it. I can't take it if I want to live forever... hahahahhaa!! (insert evil Jules laugh). That being said... it's all just proof I can do whatever I set my mind too. Now although i don't want to cut sugar out of my life completely because, lets face it. I like me a piece of cake or cookie on the RIGHT occasion. BUT I don't need it all the time or even daily. So, I after following Hollie on her blog and thinking I can't... I've realized, I don't want to... but I do WANT to change that relationship. I WANT to be able to make cookies and not scarf them down in 2 days. I want to be able to make a BD cake and not eat it all in a week by myself. So, I decided I'll start experimenting... sort of. And I'll start looking for recipes, cookbooks, Internet sites that are all based on sweetening naturally without sugar. Like with apples, etc... I used to do it when my daughter was teething from the 1st years diet section of the book... so why not do it for all of us. So I'll be working on that over this next year until I've perfected it. hhhmmm.... I can't wait. I think Hubby's work and the family get togethers will be getting a lot of trial and errors from me. hahahaha!!

3. Lets see... along with that, I've decided to work on cutting out artificial sweeteners. I've never been a fan of them. And hence why i NEVER NEVER EVER EVER will be caught dead with "diet" anything. I'm even leery of "light" things because I think things like splenda, equal, sweet n'low, etc... all have a funny taste in foods and beverages and just don't like it. Hubby hates how long ti takes me to compare the light and regular ingredients and nutrition labels. Admittedly though... i do know I have foods in my house with them in it. Like my Fiber 1 original cereal. I don't know what I'll do without it.... i really don't. So, with this, comes research. research on what to look for how to deal with it and how to cut it out. Personally... if I'm gonna die from something let be the real thing and not some chemical. And yes, I lump splenda in that category because it also tastes funny to me. So no comments on it's made from sugar please. i know... It's not the same though.

4. I'll be working on getting my entire family to be eating cleaner. I feel we do a pretty good job in this category, but I know we can do better. I've got to do it slowly so that hubby doesn't see what's coming. When he doesn't see it coming... he eases into it and accepts it. When he sees it coming... he fights it. So we'll see how it goes. #'s 2-4 all take time for research though... and this week i just don't have time for it. Even right now... I should be getting onto my workout video, but i love talking to you all so much; that I'm slacking. :) LOL

5. Last thing I've decided on. I'm giving myself more realistic goals. And 1 of them I'm coming to terms with is AZ is a freaking sauna AND oven all at the same time. Which, I've always known this... But here's where that comes in as a problem... Hubby doesn't get home until after 7am which means unless I start getting kiddo up earlier and take her with me on my running traning (which I'm not ready for stroller running)... I refuse to get heat stroke just so i can train to run when I'm this out of shape for it. It's not worth getting sick over every day right now. I know at some point when I'm in better shape i will be able to handle the heat... differently. 7am in June is cooking an egg hot and I know I will die trying to run out there. I know... do you hear a lot of excuses? Well, they may read that way... But here's what i realized... I can wait to train for running until next fall. I can still get in shape and be healthy WITHOUT running. 7am hot is still OK for walking... just not the running as I get over heated. So, every time i walk... I'll gauge how I feel... If I'm up for it... I'll run intervals like I've been doing. If it's too hot for me that day... i won't. I'll walk. On top of that I'm committed to doing an additional 30 minutes every day of Cardio/strength training anyhow... So all that really means is that come fall WATCH OUT! I'll be a training machine and by then; if I stay strong and do what I'm trying to do... walking AND cardio for about an hour a day (all together) then I'll be almost to goal by fall. And therefore running by winter and when next summer comes, I'll work on training for running in heat. Anyhow... As you can tell... I'm again changing things up, yet again. But only for the better. If I don't want my cholesterol to kill me no sense letting heat stroke do it. :)

So that's where I'm at today. A little discombobulated maybe, but that's everything that went thru my head last night and this morning. :) I swear getting healthy takes more changes and re-thinking than a college student who changes their major every semester. :) LOL

Always,
Jules