Tuesday, March 24, 2009

So this is crazy...

Okay, I'm a little annoyed and a little concerned... Do i even need to be concerned. Should I be jumping for joy or should I be checking my self in for a loony bin check. Okay, I probably have you REALLY wondering. But I've had those exact thoughts in my head for almost 3 hours now and I HAD to get them out.

Here's the deal. The last 2 days I've noticed this weird phenomenon going on after I eat. My stomach hurts. Like I just stuffed myself because I wouldn't get any more so i ate every last bite of the 4-6 servings that was in front of me kinda full. So what are you eating you may ask? Healthy! We're talking 24 points spread out between 3 meals... and sometimes I have a 2 point snack sometime during the day. And really, When I say healthy I'm talking HEALTHY. Sometimes I have an occasional "fun" lunch like corn dogs or some other I don't wanna bother food. But it's always within points and I'm VERY selective if I do this, i go into that kind of meal with both eyes open comparing points with every option & the "fill" factor of said options. Mind you, now that i write that... It'd probably be just as long to make a meal as it does to make an informed decision. hahahahahaah!! Oh well, must remember that one. So here's an average day.

Breakfast: Egg whites w/ vegi's & Canadian bacon (preparation depends on my mood) Sometimes some 0pt bread... Sometimes I throw in some cheese or other yummies like salsa.
Lunch: a wrap or salad. Always with extreme lean Turkey.
I usually use 12-14 points between breakfast & lunch so that I have 10-12 points for a snack and dinner.
Dinner: Depending on the meat i choose for the night (Always chicken or Fish) 3-6oz. & a 0pt Vegi. The rest of the points are filled in with preparation of the meat or added bonus's depending on my points left over for the day.
Snacks: usually things like grapefruit, Pretzels... turkey and cheese stick. Really, I've been boring in this department as I've not really been snacking lately.
Splurges: If I managed to eat WAY too well for the day then i splurge and use my points up with having some packaged flavored oatmeal. it's the perfect treat and the flavors make me feel like I'm eating a cake or muffin or cookie. hhhmmmm.... Beverages are easy. Coffee or water all day.

So, obviously, this is an average day. Sometimes I add extra fun points to a meal like Brie cheese or Parm cheese or I add extra dressing to a salad. I always use my AP points before I dip into my FP points when extra points are needed. I rather use what i worked darn hard for then something that's a freebie. Hey it helps to keep me from splurging and over eating all the time! :) Anyhow... The last 2 days were average days. So the problem is that after dinner and today after lunch & dinner. I was full. Not satisfied, FULL; I feel sick kinda full (still am) and I ate 3.5 hours ago. I didn't eat too fast (aka shoveling), and I didn't drink too much. My food wasn't greasy; just the opposite. Oh and no I'm not constipated, Hubby asked me that one. I just don't get it. is my stomach shrinking? Is years of over eating and now just 1.2 months of eating REAL serving size portions of things REALLY putting my stomach back to a normal non over eater size stomach. I know, sounds crazy doesn't it? Can a stomach really stretch and then shrink back? I don't know; you here things like this all the time, but is it true? But I'm really getting frustrated with it. Yesterday I didn't eat all my points because I made a really low point, but OMG so tasty dinner and when i got done cooking decided I can't possibly fatten this up. I'll have oatmeal for dessert. I was really excited about it and then... I felt sick, couldn't eat anything else. For lunch today, Same thing AGAIN (but without the oatmeal) and dinner, same... Luckily I only had 1 point not eaten for today. I have all my AP points left still for the week as I haven't needed to dip into them.

So on some level I'm happy. If it's shrinking. YEAH me. I've done something right! I've finally got a new thresh hold for fullness; and this time it's lower instead of highter. But if 5oz of chicken (upped the portion size due to point level still needing to eat today) and 2c of broccoli or 1oz pretzels (didn't eat them all though), 2oz of turkey & 2 cheese sticks... is too much.... What the heck am i going to eat? Is this where I re-evaluate my portion sizes yet again? Does that mean instead I need to add more fatty options to my meals instead of non greasy low cal options? I don't know what this means... I'm a little confused and I'm seriously feeling crazy!!

On the other hand... i just got done reading this for editing and am now wondering about something. Yes, reading my own post usually puts things in perspective for me. :) Before I got pregnant in Feb of 06 whenever I ate any kind of meat; Seafood, red meant, white meat... you name it, I would feel sick. I can't describe the feeling as it's been so long I'm not sure how the "sickness" felt. I just dealt with this feeling for YEARS because lets face it, I'm a meat girl and I didn't want to give it up. I don't mind the Vegi only way as I did do it for a while a few years back, but I like meat and always return to it's yummy goodness.... hhhmmmm. Anyhow... i Digress. I was always very careful about how much meat I ate in 1 sitting. When i ate a full serving I just knew I'd be feeling icky. While i was pregnant this all magically went away! I know, the meat fairy was on my side, she took it all away. WHOHOOOO!! I was a normal person again! I figured it would go back to the pre-prego way when I delivered her, but it didn't ever return.... So, reading this blog has brought all that back to memory. So now, maybe I'm not crazy... maybe I'm just returning back to my pre-prego day normal. And if so, what does that mean?

Geezus. Am I going to have to play with my food again to find a happy medium as I did all those years ago or is it a shrunken stomach or am I going to finally have to decide to go vegi all the way for good? I've already given up red meat, I know if I have to I can give up Chicken, but not fish. I've grown to love it. Wow isn't that a switch from years back. :) Ok, no that's negative thinking I can give up seafood to if I have to.

I guess I need to start by tracking my tummy feeling after I get done eating. I don't know. This kinda blows. But... then again, isn't this just the kind of obstacle I need to keep my new lifestyle on it's toes and keep me guessing so that i don't get bored and quit like I always have in the past? Oh wait, in the past this is the kind of thing that I would quit over. I WON"T QUIT!! We'll see happens. I'll sleep on it and decide on a plan to figuring this out tomorrow.

Always,
Jules

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